Archive - March, 2012

Spring has sprung!

March 29, 2012 in Christian Living, Goals with 0 Comments

I love spring time. It is my favorite season.

What are my favorite things about spring? New growth, renewal, things becoming green again, the Masters golf tournament, March Madness, Easter, …

What I like most about spring is that it brings an end to a difficult spell, winter! While this past winter was incredibly mild, it is nice to get it behind us, to put it in our rearview mirror.

Spring can show us a lot about life.

New growth and renewal – what new things do you want to work on this spring – maybe it is not something new, maybe it is starting something over again. Spring is a great time to do it. Maybe you want to start jogging – or learn to golf – or read more – or go for walks … get going!

Moving past something difficult – Perhaps you have gone through a difficult season of life. Now is a great time to make the decision to move forward. Make that decision. Get help if you need it. Very few people can live in the winter season 12 months of the year. It is the same when life is hard. You can’t stay in “winter” all year. Move into “spring”. Seek to move past that hurt or loss.

I know I need to get back on the exercise wagon. It is hard to believe I did a half-marathon just over five months ago. While I don’t need to train for a half-marathon (or maybe I do), I do need to get more active than I have been this past winter. I also want to read more – and learn some new things.

I also plan to sharpen some skills these next six weeks. I will take some additional coach training in Des Moines in a couple weeks. I also will attend a conference in Atlanta to help me be a better communicator at the end of April. I am very much looking forward to these opportunities!

Now, if we could only add football to the spring, then things could be perfect!

What do you want to work on this spring? What does God want you to work on?

Criticism – how do you handle it?

March 27, 2012 in Christian Living with 1 Comment

How do you handle criticism? Generally, I really suck at it. Big time.

Once in awhile, following a sermon, someone will approach me and give me some critique. Pointing out an area where they disagree – or where they feel I “missed the mark” in their opinion. This doesn’t happen terribly often, but it did happen this past Sunday.

A man from our church approached me following our first service and pointed out to me that he felt I was off base in what I shared that morning. I don’t want to get into the details of what I had said and what he thought, just suffice to say, he disagreed with some of my sermon.

This has caused me to think about a couple things. One, how should someone handle criticism? And two, how is the best way to give criticism?

How to handle criticism:

  • Respectfully listen. While I don’t think the timing of the criticism in this case was ideal, I did listen and tried not to become defensive – which is really hard.
  • Seek advice from others. I consulted with at least four other men in regard to this critique. I told the men what the other person thought and asked if they had drawn the same conclusion. Obviously if several people had the same conclusion, then that makes the criticism carry more weight.
  • Pray. I went into my office and prayed over the issues that were brought up.
  • Make some changes. The changes were small – as I did not totally agree with the critique, but I made some clarifications for the next sermon to attempt to ward off any further misunderstanding.

The Best Way to Give Constructive Criticism:

  • Allow some time to pass. I coach football and during our parent meeting each Fall, we discuss if a parent has an issue they wish to discuss with a coach, immediately following the game is generally not the best time to bring it up. I concur with this advice in regards to criticizing a sermon as well. Immediately afterwards is hard. Trust me, following a sermon, I am generally beating myself up enough all ready. Why did I say that thing that way? Why didn’t I remember to say _____? Did I connect with anyone? I should have looked things over one more time. Etc… I think it would be better to wait a day or two and then make an appointment to discuss whatever the issue is.
  • See advice. Check with some other people you respect and see if they have the same conclusion. I know there are times when I hear something and immediately jump to a conclusion. When I ask another person about it, they don’t have that same conclusion.
  • Compliment once in awhile. Am I making sure I give positive feedback as well as negative? There are just some people out there that all they do is complain. I am not saying this man falls into this category, but I know some people who do. People who I see coming towards me and I pray for the earth to open up and swallow before the person gets to me to share their gripes. I have read where it says it takes ten positive comments to overcome one negative statement. Am I giving this person I am complaining to any positive comments?

What are some ways you handle criticism?

Sabbatical – Spiritual Renewal

March 26, 2012 in Christian Living, Goals with 0 Comments

As mentioned in my last post, we have a Sabbatical policy at our church – in fact, Pastor D, our Pastor of Student Ministries, just returned from his 5-week Sabbatical. One of the goals stated in our Sabbatical Policy is Spiritual Renewal.

My question for today is how can a person be intentional about spiritual renewal if they don’t have the luxury of taking an extended time to focus on this?

As I have given this some thought, the thing someone must realize is that this will take some time. This will also require you to get away someplace where you can reflect.

Three steps come to mind to help facilitate this process.

Where are you at now?

Spend some time praying to God asking Him to address areas where your relationship with God is strong and areas where you could possible improve. Be honest with yourself, but don’t beat yourself up. Really reflect on where you are with God. Write down the strengths and “not so strong” areas. Allow the Holy Spirit to speak to you.

Where do you want to go?

What areas do you want to work on? Maybe it is your prayer life or Scripture reading? Maybe it is understanding a specific topic – like the grace of God or God’s holiness. Maybe you desire to fast or have an extended time of solitude. Pick a couple goals for your spiritual life.

How can you get there?

Just wanting to get someplace doesn’t solve our problems – usually it requires some action. What action(s) do you need to take to get where you want to go? If you goal is more prayer time, how can you accomplish this. I guarantee you that unless you have a plan it just won’t happen. Develop that plan! What resources do you have? What resources do you need? Who can help you?

Share about a time you have experienced spiritual renewal. What did this look like?

Sabbatical – Rest

March 19, 2012 in Christian Living, Health, The Kitchen Table with 0 Comments

I am blessed to be serving a church that has a Sabbatical Policy. Our policy is that after six years of service a pastor has to take at least five weeks off as a Sabbatical. The pastor is eligible for another Sabbatical every seven years. The purpose of the Sabbatical is three-fold: rest, spiritual renewal and a ministry focus (a specific project, developing a skill, learning something new, etc…).

Our Student Ministries pastor, Dikran (D), just got back from his Sabbatical. It is customary here that one’s office gets decorated to commemorate the return to work – as you can see from the picture, it involved lots of balloons and wrapping paper.

I am a year away from being eligible for my second Sabbatical. My first was very beneficial and I am just now starting to give some thought to what the next one could look like.

This has caused me to ponder. First, I think it would be awesome if each profession had a Sabbatical Policy in place for their employees. Some professions do. Teachers and school workers really get a yearly Sabbatical each summer – a time to renew and refresh for the next year of teaching. I certainly realize that most jobs do not allow for a Sabbatical time, but it would be nice if they did.

Also, if the purposes of a Sabbatical policy are important (rest, spiritual renewal and a specific focus), what are some ways we can incorporate those items into our lives on a more regular basis?

Rest

This is the one item that D mentioned to me as being the most surprising during his Sabbatical, how much rest he needed. D said it was during his time away that he realized how physically tired he was.

So, how can each of us ensure we are getting the rest we need?

Michael Hyatt wrote a helpful blogpost that discusses ways to increase one’s energy level. It is certainly worth the read.

Other than sleeping more, eating in a healthy manner, proper exercise, what are some ways to really rest?

A few ideas come to mind.

1. Perhaps once a month you should devote an entire day to rest. Sleep in as long as you can. Take a nap or two or three. Stay in your pajamas all day and lay down whenever you get a chance. Seek to catch up on rest on this day.

2. Take a vacation that is not focused on doing things and going places. Go someplace to just relax. We have been blessed to vacation at a lake in Minnesota a few times and to the Atlantic Ocean. Both locations, the biggest concern was if the lawn chair would leave lines on your legs or if the ropes from the hammock would actually hold your body weight. I am sure Disney is great. Golfing is a blast. Going to museums, ball games and sight-seeing are fun. I challenge to you take a vacation to do nothing except chill.

3. Get in a daily nap. I love naps. Unfortunately, they only tend to happen on Sundays as who has time during the week? I have read about the benefits of a daily 20-minute “power nap”. I will have to try this out!

4. Get adequate sleep. Most people stay up too late and get up too early. We have all heard people brag by saying that they only need 4 hours of sleep a night. Hogwash! They may be able to get by with this for a season, but not long-term. Most things I have read say a person needs 8 to 9 hours of sleep a night. How much sleep do you get each night?

What am I missing here? What can you do to ensure you are getting the rest you need?

Decisions, decisions, decisions …

March 13, 2012 in Christian Living, Goals, The Kitchen Table with 0 Comments

Today, I made a trip to the Twin Cities with my three daughters. We had a great trip.

The purpose of the trip was twofold. One reason was to get Bailey up to Bethel University so she could spend the week of Spring Break with her fiancé, Michael – not together mind you. The second reason was to take our youngest daughter, Charlsea, to see some colleges. We drove through Northwestern College in Saint Paul, spent about an hour at Bethel and then visited the University of Minnesota.

 

It was quite a day. I don’t want to focus on the college visits today, but I do want to discuss how we are making this decision because how we make this decision is really no different than how any decision can be made.

1. We have prayed for God to give Charlsea (and us) wisdom.

2. We are looking at the options. A couple months ago, Charlsea narrowed down her possibilities to the 48 contiguous states. A month ago, she narrowed it even further to the Midwest. She wasn’t sure if she wanted large or small, so we are visiting each.

3. We are investigating even further. This involves making visits to schools. We hit three today and will hit four more onThursday and Friday. Following each visit we are encouraging Charlsea to write down what she liked or did not like and questions that she still has.

4. We are looking at what might be the “best fit” specifically. We know Charlsea, she knows her self. Some places will be a good fit for her personality and gifts. Others not so much. Is one school better for her potential major than another? Right now, she is thinking about medical school in her future. Does one school better prepare her for that option?

5. We are trying not to stress over this decision. Sometimes this is easier said than done. While this is a big decision, I think there are many great options.

6. We are being patient. Fortunately, this is not a decision that has to be made any time soon. We will eventually get to the point where a decision has to be made. I think one of the biggest reasons people make poor decisions is that they don’t start their process far enough ahead of time. Don’t rush into decisions!

7. We are praying for wisdom – throughout!

I don’t know where Charlsea will end up in regards to her college decision. I am finding it an exciting process though!

How do you make decisions?

 

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